stumbling over myself

Stumbling Over Myself ©

By 

Michael Casey

Well it’s 31st Jan 2022 and Tinnitus is killing me, lack of sleep etc, not to mention constant din, children are not as bad. Anyway, enough of that, you may be glad as I cannot do as much writing, just Bullet Point stuff instead. But as you all know 2,000,000 words, 20 books, 2000 stories, 3600 pieces all told, are to be found on my Wordpress and Blogger, just Google Michael Casey the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham. 

That paragraph was for any stragglers to my sites, spammer beware too, I don’t want you. So, what am I going to bore you with today? Well I have loaded up a load of Russian Translations to keep the armies at bay, just stay away. A bit of Peace is all I want. I still play the Peace album from 20 years ago constantly, the Eurythmics.  I don’t like the modern version they did. My album collection is now on my devices so I can play it everywhere, but 20 years ago was when I stopped regular Music buying, marriage and poverty puts an end to all that. What else, as it is Chinese New Year, the Tiger, I’ve loaded up Chinese Simplified Translations. So, when you are down the takeaway tell them where to look to see my stuff, though they may think you are crackers. I need to eat now, so you have some egg fried rice while I have some salmon and rice, healthy eating, though at 127kilos I do need to lose a lot.

Well did you enjoy your food? Mine was fine, though I need to slap on the pain killer now, so wait there while I do that, then I’ll continue. It’s 3rd Feb now and I’m continuing this. So every day I look at the newspapers, 3 of them, then I look to see who’s been reading me, then I check my email to see what rubbish has been sent to me. Supermarket wins are tops at the moment, though some I’d never go to, one of the family just got food poisoning from a supermarket sandwich. And I never thrust any of them. Always hover, always check sender IP, then delete unread. Any competition will just hack your card. 

So when I’m on my sites I can see country and piece of writing read, sometimes I can match them up, other times I can guess. So why do Iran, Jordan, UAE read me, not forgetting Pakistan too, that’s just today. I don’t know, perhaps they are practicing their English so they can all speak in a Posh Birmingham accent. The full-on Birmingham or Brummie accent you would not understand. I speak the way I do because I had an Irish mum with a Kerry accent, and dad after decades in steel works with lots of Welsh guys, didn’t have any accent I could hear. Added to that I spent 20 years, yes 20 years listening to BBC Radio 4, before Reginal accents drifted in. That’s why my Esol English students liked my clear accent.

As I check my reading figures across my 4 sites, 2 main, and 2 backups, I see what you have all been reading. Some I’ll remember by the title, some I cannot, so I’ll click and read for myself. A photo album of words so to speak. And as I talk to you the pain descends again. So, I’ll move about and come back to you, with JMJarre playing his Revolutions. Well I had chicken soup and seeded bread, and yes the seeds always come out the other end like those famous coffee beans. I also spoke to my GP, for blood results, GFR 27 now, got more painkillers too. My body needs a different gel, as the other not strong enough anymore.

Beatles singing She’s Leaving Home, very touching. I wrote Lech, Boris and Gregorgi Check it Out when my big daughter went off to University, worth a read. They are Polish/Ukrainian/Russian first cousins who have adventures. I’ve written ten stories or so with them in. True Eastern Europe values, Love, Food, Family when this nonsense finishes maybe somebody will make Cartoons or films with them in. Look online for the stories.

So, I look at what you have all been reading then the memories and sometimes tears fall. Normally I write, do a quick proof read, then Post and add to current book I’m creating. Then read again. So, it can be 3 reads and I’m done, until I spot whatever you people, you people, can mean anybody anywhere, so don’t go Woke on me. If you go Woke then I’ll hit the back of your bare legs with a wet lettuce. Google Larry Grayson for more details. 

As for inspiration, you’ve seen the old house, I just looked out the window and away I go. The window here is bigger, but the inspiration is less. 2,000,000 words now after all. I could rattle off stories but I do need that speed typist, as with Tinnitus it’s like the tide is coming in fast, so not enough time to write write so to speak. I am no Canute, but some of you may be thinking otherwise. So, don’t get your feet wet or those pretend leather shoes will get wet. Normally one hour is all I need to write a new piece. Then 30 mins for posting and backups, which is the boring bit. But SECURITY is everything.

Back to Stumbling, Mark Harris said I was a good stumbler, I just told him he was a Canute, as Barry will no doubt remember. But words arrive with stories attached, and I just nudge them a bit, I’m a story nudger, though Mark if he sees this may call me something else. A metaphor is always funnier, and you can reach a wider audience by not being Profane. PG to 12 is the audience level for all my writing, though not as useful as PG Tips tea, but I hope I don’t make a monkey out of any of you. You all hate my writing equally. The people I mention, or myself are just Fools, who should be laughed at, and left locked out in the cold, while you have a mug of PG Tips. Then when the teapot is cold you allow me to have the dregs, with only the gingernuts left which nobody likes, except the ginger haired girl, who happens to be a speed typist. So, as we drink the cold tea, and eat stale ginger nuts, she sets the page on fire as I dictate to her. Where did that random Kpop girl come from

And maybe that’ll be the next story.