Explaining Politics to Children

Tuesday, 22 February 2022

Explaining Politics to Children

Now as I begin my shoulder kicks off so I've slapped on the pain killer and taken paracetamol, 

I have to watch what I take, GFR 27 now, so kidneys beware. Maybe my Pain investigations at Hospital

this week will find the answer, frankly I think they won't and I'll continue my life of pain.

I finished my daily trawl of the Press. I started to read one column, but found the writing irritating. 

So I'll never read her again.  Style yes, but not yours. Though she may say, I'm rubbish too. 

Though I'd say I'm readable, readers in 100 countries, so maybe only Foreigner like my style.

Jon and Emily from the BBC have jumped ship, for the money, as BBC never pays enough

or so their managers would say. But Podcasts, I'd stick to BBC Radio 4 myself. 

As well as BBC and Sky tv, and 3 English Papers and a trawl of USA stuff

That's why I insist on readability.

Boris has saved his own bacon with Covid rules ending

He was on form yesterday

Though now the RUSSIA restrictions should be FULL  ON straight away

The thing about Despots is they don't have any voters

So Democracies are slower by nature

In USA they are Isolationists, and everybody has snout in trough for Midterms

Hillary comeback says it all, she is ridiculous, shows how bad her party is

Can they not find anybody good

Today is the end of Biden, and Lame Duck beckons

He has to save himself today re Russia

GOP is corrupt, believing in Trump a criminal

No wonder the Chancer PUTIN thinks he can get away with anything

This is a moment in History

But Politicians fudge, and USA says its nothing to do with USA

You cannot wait for a Pearl Harbour moment before waking up

And yes the Woke Generation don't really care

So long as they can bitch and protest without any RESPONSIBILITY

So long as they can take SELFIES

The Price of Freedom is Eternal Vigilance

And Freedom costs money too

You pay for it in Taxes

But people just want to watch Reality TV

And not look at actual Reality, as nobody watches the News

Not Opinion Shows, but Real Hard News

Believing Facebook who could not be bothered to PAY for Real News

Everybody needs to Wake Up

I could go on, but you are all bored all ready

You want to watch sports on tv, with all the doping too

But who is the Dope in the End?

It's YOU

and now for a piece of writing, the above is a chat and would not appear in my books

Though with Tinnitus always screaming, new new material is hard to produce

but you may be thankful for that

You'll make me cry, pass me a tissue

Somebody was reading this last night if they looked at old 2015 stuff

Explaining Politics To Children ©

By Michael Casey

Imagine you have to explain Politics to kids, what would you say and how would you do it? All Politicians are Liars and Bastards could be a good opening to begin with and grab their attention. Politics is all about Public Service, could be another line, just make sure you don’t say pubic service by mistake or you’ve lost your audience forever.

So what exactly is Politics, “the art of the possible” is one famous quote, you get a stale 2 week old Easter egg if you know who said that, no cheating on Google. Will kids in today’s world believe you if you said the Liberals were once a major force in politics and Labour is a new party, relatively speaking. Would kids have heard of the Whigs, and where exactly did the Tories come from as a name for the Conservatives, “nobody knows  Sir, they are just bastards” may be one interjection from Clegg at the back.

So you start by explaining what Democracy is, the kids say that this lesson is so boring and vote that they go and play football outside instead. So then you have to explain that teachers are dictators, so can they all sit down again and put the ball down. Such is modern day teaching, having taught myself this writer can vouch that it is even worse than that.

So you start the simple way, you’ll explain each party in turn. So you start with the Labour Party, so some wag at the back says it’s a party for pregnant women. So you reply that it’s an ever growing party as their numbers grow every 9 months. Then you talk about unions etc, the kids think this is so boring, until another wag says the students union is the best one, as the beer is so cheap, and he cannot wait to be a student. Was Tony Blair’s policy all about getting millions to drink cheap beer? I suppose in the end you do get a degree as well, I’m told 41% gets you an engineering degree, but the maths is so hard, could Prince Harry have passed engineering maths?

You try explaining Liberals next. The class is ahead of you and say they are all wear anoraks and smoke skunk, that’s why they wear sandals as laces would just be too much on shoes, besides laces become snakes if you take too many legal highs. As for yellow being their colour, it’s because they eat too many curries, but Birmingham is the best place in the world for curries, did Sir know that? Liberals like jointing things, such as Cameron’s government,  in fact they’ll join anything,  it’s the only way they can make friends.

Moving on to the Conservative, the clue is in the name, conserve, keep steady and not change too much. Aren’t they just rich bastards Sir? So you have to explain they have their own businesses and work hard, that’s why they move to nice areas. So they don’t have to mix with the likes of Smith and Jones, Sir, comes from the back. So you ask a rhetorical question, imagine you win the lottery, where would you go and live? I’d live in a nice house with those rich bastards the Conservatives, Sir.

UKIP, is next on your list, does anybody know what UKIP stands for? They don’t even know themselves , Sir, comes from the back. So you explain, United Kingdom Independence Party. And no they are not a Real Ale appreciation party. They are more than that, though judging by the leader, there is a large element of truth in that statement.

Scottish Nationalists, what exactly are they? Well they are Scottish and they are in fact a Separatist Party. They hate the English or so it feels, they are very clever because the educational standards are higher in Scotland. If only I could teach in Scotland bemoans the teacher as he kicks the football and it hits Clegg on the back of his head, but at least it makes Clegg pay attention.

All of the parties do have one thing in common, they love the sound of their own voice, they love being interviewed and getting a few quid every time they are on telly. The food and drink in the Houses of Parliament are great and cheap, that’s why a lot of M.P.s become alcoholics or just fat, that’s why they lean back and sleep in the chamber. The story of microphones imbedded in the furniture is just a myth they are just a bunch of old sots.

Now students I do hope I’ve explained the political system to you, we do have such a bunch of wonderful people ruling us. You can watch The Ruling Class the 1972 film with Peter O’Toole as homework. Don’t forget as you can now vote at 16, thanks to Prime Minister Miliband, don’t forget to go out and vote on Thursday. Now let’s go outside and play football.  Sir’s been smoking skunk again laugh the kids, Sir must be a Liberal.