Fat Silver Haired Writer in Shades from Birmingham ENGLAND

Michael Casey michaelgcasey@gmail.com

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A Nudist’s Guide to Walking ©

By

Michael Casey

As everybody is talking about Covid 19, I don’t really need to say too much about it in my writing. And we’ll all be sick to the back teeth with Plays and Films all about it. Why? Because 7 billion, 7,000,000,000 of us have experienced it, so do we want to pay a dollar to see the film of it? No doubt howls or rage, but would you want Christmas 365 days a year? That’s taken the howls down by 6,000,000,000 at least. Now to amuse you all, while you spit at the screen, here’s an account of my Locked Up Life, what I am being a hypocrite, or just another government adviser. No, I don’t have any  women sneaking into to my home to give me “personal care”, maybe I should put my address and phone number at the end of the post.

 

Now as you know I have to be careful having had a heart bypass, so I stay indoors and things are delivered, in a way not much different to my life prior to Covid 19, though as a government advisor, I do get recreational visits from women twice a week. That’s a joke should you be speed reading this. So, what do I do for exercise? Well going to the toilet 20 times a day is my exercise, as the toilet is far away from where I am sat most of the day in front of my PC, though I do use a 9 or 10 year old tv as a screen for comfort, and soft toilet paper too. 20 x 40= 800, so toilet time is 800 metres, because I walk or run there and back every time I have to go.  I did not realise it was that much, it explains why my belly has not got even fatter.

 

Obviously, I’ve been told to stay indoors, because I’m such an ugly ____, insert a word to describe me, you really are such cruel people. I  wouldn’t let you in twice a week, such horrid horrid words to talk about me. So I do need a bit of other exercise, up and down the stairs to use the bog is not enough, so what do I do? Well if you’ve read the title of today’s talk, I go walking in the nude. The weather has been so kind, so I take advantage of the weather.

 

At night when the coast is clear I disrobe, and sneak out the front door as naked as I was born. Letting the breeze blow the cobwebs away is always nice, better still if there are no cobwebs, and if there are then you have not been exercising enough, I won’t elaborate, let’s just say you’ll have nothing new delivered at Christmas. So gently and gingerly I skip down the garden path, winking at our garden gnomes, who hide their eyes behind their fingers. Have they never seen a manly man naked in a front garden before?

 

Then I look left and right and decide spontaneously  which direction to go, in the end there only is one direction, so humming Harry Style’s hits I prance off. As I go along the pavement I look all about me, the whole street has been abandoned these Covid 19 days, so I move into the centre of the actual road, and off the pavement. I can wiggle my way manfully, stopping occasionally to touch my toes. I am so fortunate I have such a firm pair of buns, a lifetime of standing and prancing around computer rooms and foyers and so forth has made me such a tight arse. If I really were a government adviser women would visit twice a week to interrogate me, just how did you get such a tight arse, would always be on their lips.

 

So, I nimbly walk about my area, up down and around and back again, a circuit in the twilight, my hairy mass and ever so gorgeous tight ass on display as I go about my way. Then tossing my head backwards I let my ever so gorgeously soft and silver hair wave in the twilight twinkle of the stars. Aliens from above would remark, why is that fat fool prancing around naked in the dark, I thought it was only us aliens who never wear clothes. Though he has such a tight fat arse, perhaps we should abduct him, and get him to breed with us aliens, then we aliens would have great arses like him. He can keep his silver hair, us aliens are all Gingers, it’s a know fact, aliens are Gingers.  

 

After 20 mins, I have had enough exercise and its is time to come home, nobody will recognise me in the dark, beside I have no clothes on, so how could they identify me. Well apart from the A3 size brown and hairy birthmark on my left shoulder, but nobody would ever see that in the dark. I get home and the garden gnomes avert their eyes again, though one local cat  runs away in fear, seeing me naked before them. A takeaway deliveryman spots me and pukes all over the pizza he is delivering, pepperoni of course.

 

I get back inside and get myself a Stella from the fridge, I deserve it. So on I go with my night-time nude exercise, nobody will ever be the wiser. Unfortunately there is an App, and everybody is using it, not the Covid 19 App, but WhatsApp, I have been filmed, and everybody but everybody in Old Forge and Singing Anvil has recorded and shared my dusk dancing and prancing in the dark. I have even been edited together to cover all my routes, a full HD video of dear naked me.

Then one night as I have my key in the lock, a voice behind me, it’s a policeman, he follows me inside my home. I’ve been spotted, it’s a fair cop. And indeed it was, for it was a fake moustache, the Policeman was really a women in disguise, she had come to take down my particulars. The rest you can make up for yourselves, as we practice with handcuffs…..


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michaelgcasey
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GenderMale
IndustryArts
OccupationI write funny stuff 3,172,483 verified words , read in 171 countries so far michaelgcasey@hotmail.com
LocationBirmingham England, https://www.amazon.com/MichaelCasey/e/B00571G0YC, United Kingdom
LinksAudio Clip, Wishlist
Introductionhttps://anchor.fm/michael-casey1 IS MY PODCASTI'm Michael Casey from Birmingham England, the fat silver haired writer in shades. MY 3,172,483 WORD plus IP is for sale Beware of Others with the EXACT SAME NAME, they are not me, and would not want to be me ...I've done loads of writing, 3,000,000 Words worth over 37 years nowBut before I started I LISTENED to BBC Radio 4 for 20 years, from the age of 10 or youngerFrank Brown our lodger, went back to County Tyrone and he gifted us his Bush Radio55 years in love with words, and I still look so dashing.I have a picture in the attic, just like Dorian GrayI've also had an interest in Politics for 50 yearswith my dad heckling the tv and Politicians.I also suffer various illnesses including Tinnitus which is not a Roman lover, just lots of hiss, a whirlwind HORRENDOUS , and CHRONIC PAIN mainly left shoulder. ckd and quadruple heart bypass as well, I collect diseasesContact michaelgcasey@hotmail.com to talk, no scammers required.
Interests210,000 FREE downloads in Multple languages.. The Books I've Written:-1.The Butcher The Baker and The Undertaker 2.Shoplife 3.Essays and Plays 4.Blogs 2011 5.300 and Not OUT 6.Shorts 2013 7.More Shorts 2014 8.Quick Stories 9.Still Alive 2015 10.Undiscovered Words 2016 11.Still Smiling 2017 12.Altogether Now 13.New Horizons 14.14 Up 15.15 Down 16.Sweet Sixteen 17. 17 Again 18. 18 New Views19.The Final Cut of The 19th Hole 20. 2020 Words 21.Tinnitus Tales 2020 to 2024https://www.amazon.co.uk/Michael-Casey/e/B00571G0YC to buy ebooksI have readers in maybe 171 Countries now, and up to 20 Translations are simultaneously read on the same day via my Wordpress accounthttps://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com/tens of 1000s downloads, Koreans seem to like me mostBut Arabs do too. Translations Galore for free on my Wordpress, Still waiting for Media to pick me upA VERY BIG THANK YOU TO SINGAPORE for being my biggest Reader everywhere apart from my main blogger site, but I'm sure you will catch up
Favorite moviesYES. 210,000 FREE downloads in Multiple LANGUAESIts a Wonderful Life, RED & Red2, Hot Fuzz, Star Trek films, The Quiet Man, and good Thrillers, Vincenzo and other great Kdramas too, Link is to 1950s Don Camillo film in English.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wLf6VQyJJkEhttps://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com/the Wordpress has Multiple TranslationsSo you can all suffer 171 countries when I recounted recently, just Google Michael Casey the fat silver haired writer in shades from Birmingham ENGLAND
Favorite musicYES TWO MILLION CLICKS NOW, my words traveleven if I have had zero holidays in 13 years due to PAIN attacks. Pink,JMJarre,Will Young,Annie Lennox,BarryWhite,Celine,Clapton, Mylie Cyrus,TaylorSwift,Katy Perry. I share my bed with all of them, perhaps I need a bigger bed or a better mattress. I have Tinnitus so I listen to Music at night until sleep finally arrives. I used to go to live music in a bar for years, so I know a good band when i hear onehttps://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com/
Favorite booksA Nudist’s Guide to Walking ©

By

Michael Casey

As everybody is talking about Covid 19, I don’t really need to say too much about it in my writing. And we’ll all be sick to the back teeth with Plays and Films all about it. Why? Because 7 billion, 7,000,000,000 of us have experienced it, so do we want to pay a dollar to see the film of it? No doubt howls or rage, but would you want Christmas 365 days a year? That’s taken the howls down by 6,000,000,000 at least. Now to amuse you all, while you spit at the screen, here’s an account of my Locked Up Life, what I am being a hypocrite, or just another government adviser. No, I don’t have any  women sneaking into to my home to give me “personal care”, maybe I should put my address and phone number at the end of the post.

 

Now as you know I have to be careful having had a heart bypass, so I stay indoors and things are delivered, in a way not much different to my life prior to Covid 19, though as a government advisor, I do get recreational visits from women twice a week. That’s a joke should you be speed reading this. So, what do I do for exercise? Well going to the toilet 20 times a day is my exercise, as the toilet is far away from where I am sat most of the day in front of my PC, though I do use a 9 or 10 year old tv as a screen for comfort, and soft toilet paper too. 20 x 40= 800, so toilet time is 800 metres, because I walk or run there and back every time I have to go.  I did not realise it was that much, it explains why my belly has not got even fatter.

 

Obviously, I’ve been told to stay indoors, because I’m such an ugly ____, insert a word to describe me, you really are such cruel people. I  wouldn’t let you in twice a week, such horrid horrid words to talk about me. So I do need a bit of other exercise, up and down the stairs to use the bog is not enough, so what do I do? Well if you’ve read the title of today’s talk, I go walking in the nude. The weather has been so kind, so I take advantage of the weather.

 

At night when the coast is clear I disrobe, and sneak out the front door as naked as I was born. Letting the breeze blow the cobwebs away is always nice, better still if there are no cobwebs, and if there are then you have not been exercising enough, I won’t elaborate, let’s just say you’ll have nothing new delivered at Christmas. So gently and gingerly I skip down the garden path, winking at our garden gnomes, who hide their eyes behind their fingers. Have they never seen a manly man naked in a front garden before?

 

Then I look left and right and decide spontaneously  which direction to go, in the end there only is one direction, so humming Harry Style’s hits I prance off. As I go along the pavement I look all about me, the whole street has been abandoned these Covid 19 days, so I move into the centre of the actual road, and off the pavement. I can wiggle my way manfully, stopping occasionally to touch my toes. I am so fortunate I have such a firm pair of buns, a lifetime of standing and prancing around computer rooms and foyers and so forth has made me such a tight arse. If I really were a government adviser women would visit twice a week to interrogate me, just how did you get such a tight arse, would always be on their lips.

 

So, I nimbly walk about my area, up down and around and back again, a circuit in the twilight, my hairy mass and ever so gorgeous tight ass on display as I go about my way. Then tossing my head backwards I let my ever so gorgeously soft and silver hair wave in the twilight twinkle of the stars. Aliens from above would remark, why is that fat fool prancing around naked in the dark, I thought it was only us aliens who never wear clothes. Though he has such a tight fat arse, perhaps we should abduct him, and get him to breed with us aliens, then we aliens would have great arses like him. He can keep his silver hair, us aliens are all Gingers, it’s a know fact, aliens are Gingers.  

 

After 20 mins, I have had enough exercise and its is time to come home, nobody will recognise me in the dark, beside I have no clothes on, so how could they identify me. Well apart from the A3 size brown and hairy birthmark on my left shoulder, but nobody would ever see that in the dark. I get home and the garden gnomes avert their eyes again, though one local cat  runs away in fear, seeing me naked before them. A takeaway deliveryman spots me and pukes all over the pizza he is delivering, pepperoni of course.

 

I get back inside and get myself a Stella from the fridge, I deserve it. So on I go with my night-time nude exercise, nobody will ever be the wiser. Unfortunately there is an App, and everybody is using it, not the Covid 19 App, but WhatsApp, I have been filmed, and everybody but everybody in Old Forge and Singing Anvil has recorded and shared my dusk dancing and prancing in the dark. I have even been edited together to cover all my routes, a full HD video of dear naked me.

Then one night as I have my key in the lock, a voice behind me, it’s a policeman, he follows me inside my home. I’ve been spotted, it’s a fair cop. And indeed it was, for it was a fake moustache, the Policeman was really a women in disguise, she had come to take down my particulars. The rest you can make up for yourselves, as we practice with handcuffs…..

6200 pieces of writing PERFECT for ESOL> Don Camillo , The Book Thief,online newspapers, I am a news Junkie for 57 years now. Sadly some newspapers are just comicshttps://anchor.fm/michael-casey1 IS MY PODCASTAmazon has my 22 books if you hack through the jungle, There are 200 stories or TWELVE HOURS OF AUDIO on my Typepad toohttps://open.spotify.com/show/1wSSIExkhsR97u1jqj0iiR is my PODCASTI have readers in 171 Countries now, all by word of mouth, and up to 20 Translations are simultaneously read on the same day via my Wordpress account. 1000s of Translations have been downloaded from my Wordpress. YOU ONLY GET THE STORIES IN MY BOOKS, THE CHATS REMAIN ON THE SITES https://michaelgcaseyfrombirminghamengland.wordpress.com/Blogger has over 6000 pieces of writing YES 6000, 2000 of which are StoriesI never run out of ideas. Though I've slowed down as Tinnitus does not help the Writing Process, so I dream of a Speed Typist so I could Dictate InsteadThis past 3 years I've written too much about Putin's Genocide in Ukraine, I pray he disappears overnight, taken away by the Fairies....I send daily emails to Moscow to annoy them and they do read me!Tinnitus is killing me, and daily pain is no fun either. not forgetting Quadruple. Heart Bypass 10 years ago plus Stage 4 Kidney Failure.But I hope I can make you all laugh a bit while you read me on the toilet. But don't set fire to your trousers while you have a fag, Paul did that on night shift maybe 30 years ago, by the way a fag means cigarette in UK

so here's a sample straight from the lab

and I just met a man in the street called WEB

Pad Web 40 years ago told me to write a book

so maybe it's a sign from God









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