Broadband Fast

Broadband Fast ©

By

Michael Casey

No it’s not a mistake, it is Broadband Fast, not Fast Broadband. Why? Because we are changing our broadband and tv provider, so it’s a fast, a break, as far as the family is concerned. We may or may not be moving house soon, but one thing led to another, and so we have lost our tv and will lose the broadband in the morning. Getting the company to actually talk to you is another matter, they have send me 2 sorry to hear you are leaving surveys but after 5 emails to them they have not actually talked to me about the matter I want to talk about. I won’t name and shame them, they know who they are!

I gave the family fair warning a week ago about the broadband, but now with a day to go they are in denial, it couldn’t happen to us, it shouldn’t happen to us, why is this happening to us? What will we do without broadband? Try talking to each other I suggested. One daughter is hurrying to do all her homework, the Internet and Broadband was not even invented when I last did my homework. How they’d manage without it I just cannot imagine. We used to have a set of encyclopaedia on the top shelf of the school library, which happened to be right next to my desk in Class One.

I’ve updated my software just in case it’s more than a few days before any transfer takes over. I’ve backed up my stories for the zillionth time too, so Now all I can do is write a couple of new stories to upload once the broadband returns. I have fed my website, mainly for my Polish readers who did love my stuff in the past, so Polish Translations are there for them all. If only they email en masse Polish Media then I could finally get a book and radio deal in Poland. Then maybe I’d be a celebrity at the Polish deli at the corner of my street.

My eldest daughter is chilling then she hopes to hit the books gently during her 2 months of Summer holidays before she starts her A levels and that she hopes will lead her to studying Medicine at Cambridge. That’s the plan anyway. Who knows she may sneak off to the Library at the bottom of the road where her sister’s Godmother works. Maybe not to read any books but to use the wifi there. Kids are addicted to wifi. As for me, I use it to upload my stories and read all the newspapers. And watch BBC news, while the family tv is being used to watch Kardasians or other junk tv.

Conversation may return to our house while the wifi has a rest, though there is something called Reading, this may re-emerged from the undergrowth. In my case reading will stop, as I read off the screen, all the newspapers, that’s another reason I wear shades, it stops screen glare.

People will think of other reasons why they have computers, or then again they will not. Computer and wifi go together, like milk in your tea, or man and woman, though I should say other forms or relationship are available. You can play games on your computer, though I have never done that. Years ago I actually bought an Atari 1040 not for the games features but so I could use it to write stories on.

Yes I am that boring, but nowadays games are fantastic and the UK has a great gaming industry, my friends at work actually wrote a game and sold it for 10K years ago. However afterwards they never did any more, they did advise me to buy the Atari, so blame Dave and Pad for my writing, I don’t know where they live now so you can’t go around to congratulate them or hurl abuse at them.

Broadband speed tests let you know just how fast or slow your wifi connection is, and should it slow to a crawl then if after tests they still can’t fix it then its time to leave one and try another. There are lots of offers out there. So as this has happened to us, and then there is potential to change house, we have deserted our broadband and tv provider. The new provider is promising great things, so I’ll let you know are they any good.

What will I be doing during the wifi fast, well I’ll be writing about the wifi fast, and about just how hard my computer chair is now that I’ve thrown out the big old black chair you see me sitting in in the photos.

Though it may make me write faster as the chair, a wooden one, is hard, and my behind is so sensitive as is the rest of me. Don’t mock or I’ll translate this into your Native language and then it’ll be you who is really suffering.

So its time to eat now, this may be a broadband fast, but that does not stop me from eating, even though I have to go to the Dental Hospital to have some roots out. Stay happy and see if you can live without your wifi.