Tossing and Turning

Tossing and Turning (c)

 by Michael Casey

Well it’s 21st Jan 2023, just so you archaeologists of words know. I haven’t done much new writing this past year, because my Tinnitus is horrendous. Switch the fire alarm on and stand under it for an hour, get the picture now. Then imagine it getting louder when its triggered by the extractor fan on the cooker, or in the bath room, not to mention cold weather and storms in the air.

So, you are all lucky lucky people. The noise in your head can be so much, it actually causes pain. In my case the hearing in my right ear is almost gone, I can hear a bit, but the overwhelming sensation is NOISE, despite deafness, the NOISE of Tinnitus. Tinnitus is not a Gay Roman lover either. It’s just terrible, and for some so bad, it becomes fatal.

Now in bed I listen to Taylor Swift, or anything as a distraction so I can get to sleep. However, I still wake up every 2 hours, such is my CKD. When after a night of tossing and turning, though I can only sleep on my right side due to my hernia in the middle of my bypass scar, I’ve had enough sleep I get up. But then the fun begins, because the scream has to die down before I can do anything. And even when or if it dies down, it’s very hard to concentrate long enough to write a piece. That’s why I’ve been using bullet points this past year.

And as I finish my coffee, my brain is distracted from my flow so I have to force myself to remember what I was going to say next. My left shoulder as per usual wants to get in on the act too. So, I have to literally stop so I can slap on hemp pain killer, my neighbours think something kinky is going on, all the sound of slapping echoes around our house. If only, if only.

Now my Tinnitus is fizzing louder, but the pain killer on my shoulder should kick in soon, and I may have a paracetamol in a bit. Daily paracetamol for 8 years, my GFR is 25 now, so I cannot use any old pain killer, or it would kill my kidneys more. Anyway I’ve written or bullet pointed a lot about Ukraine, because it is Hitler all over again, but now the name has changed to Putin. Germany helps a lot, but is afraid of its own History, so they could do more. And as for the score 180,000 Russians dead, according to latest USA intelligence. 180,000 Russians DEAD.

But Putin does not care, because he hides behind History, Nazis and all that, but the irony is Russia under him are the Nazis committing Genocide. And on it goes, and in the West people are tired of it, as paying the Gas bill is all they care about. As for me I studied History a bit, and I also know about Fatima. Basically the Virgin Mary said Russia were bad lads. And History proves her right. 

So that’s why I’ve put Holy Pictures on my websites, and that’s way daily I send Holy Pictures to 12 to 18 email addresses in Moscow, with a little message too. They may have all have gone straight to Junk Mail, but what else can I do a buggered up body, with scars everywhere, with noise in my head, I am useless. Or maybe I am not, cos I can say a Rosary, even if I am totally useless in the eyes of man, or holy people.  So, if everybody does a little bit, in the end Putin will fall. And Mother Russia will behave like a mother to its own people, as well as the rest of the world