Almost a Poem (c)
By Michael Casey
Well me and Tinnitus are going
through a strange period, not staying awake all night till exhaustion and sleep
arrive. But chunks of sleep and not being awake till they arrive. Though 3am
where were you? I was having toast and Ovaltine, a snack and a hot drink seems
to being sleep to me.
Sometimes Totoro our cat arrives,
to be let out to plague the countryside, or just to chill with the nearby
foxes, but not Gumiho, so I let the cat out and away she leaps. Setting off
lights and movement sensors all over the neighbourhood. That's how I know when
she wants to come in when she's out late drinking with the foxes. The lights
light up everywhere, so me in my Tinnitus time put on a dressing gown and go
downstairs to let her in.
Last night I had a poem come to
me, 1% of my output is poetry of sorts, so 20 out of 2000 pieces maybe. When I
get a poem it tends to be very good, yes in my opinion, but most people almost
always agree too. I really should record any stray ideas and snatches, then I'd
have more material to annoy you with. But I'm no Stevie Wonder, though I do
have my share of Inner Visions, he has recording equipment by his bed. Me I
just want to sleep, I do have aa old phone directing a smart speaker through the
night. And yes Sting has been added to the night shift, so Taylor Swift can get
a rest, and be fresh in the morning to do the High Dusting in my study. As you
know her lad works in the chip shop down the hill, and that's how I kill two
birds with one stone.
So there I was thinking, and with
Tinnitus your brain can go into overdrive as you fight to sleep, that's why it
is so debilitating, not to mention my other weaknesses. I got a theme about
Land and Peace and Faith and Geography. History is Geography, and, you Cannot
beat Geography. Something for all armies to think about, as well as with Faith
you can Move Mountains. If you know that then you can achieve something, with
Love.
I had a few lines and said to
myself, that's good as I was half asleep and half awake and half in pain,
Tinnitus is part of the Sine Curve of pain that I endure for 8 years now, first
starting with Arthur my arthritis. When it hits it is deeper and longer, my
pain. The night time Tinnitus seems to be worse too. But I want to talk about
the Words, I had a line here and there so I promised myself I'd put it together
in the morning, like flatpack furniture. Only I lost the allen key, or rather I
lost the words by the time I was finally ready to arise. I still awake every 2
hours, so by the time I'd had my 8 hours, after Tinnitus time, the allen key to
attach the words together had gone. Maybe I need a Gumiho I could dictate to in
the night, but that is just a fantasy in all senses of the word and my
imagination .
You have to have words and dreams
and Gumiho fantasies even, because without them the pain would be far to much
to bear, and no I'm not joking, I wish I were. Today my small daughter tells me
our study clock is famous, as it chimes through the online lessons, and her
French teacher calls it charming, though this dad is no Prince. The Geography
class recognise the chimes too, meanwhile Jesus he Knows Me is playing on my
speaker, Music the Genesis for everything. And yes Jesus does know me, and
Saint Jude’s too, for when you are awake in the night, the conversation ebbs
and flows like as does the Music of My Night, Andrew where is your Webber?
Music is a cobweb catching thoughts in the night, dreams, hopes, and fantasies,
as well as curses and pain, bouncing and rippling everywhere.
So that's all I have for
today, maybe the Poem will arrive, they are gifts, they arrive and my train of
thought marshals them in the station. I do not control the Poetry timetable,
they are free spirits like Totoro our cat. The other writing is fast and furious,
maybe my subconscious is telling me to squeeze out all I have, my only gift for
my two teenage daughters. Then the page will flutter and fall down like falling
leaves and my tree of words will be bare, and I'll turn to mush like fallen
Autumn leaves on the wood's floor.
So enjoy me while I'm still here,
as I constantly tell my daughters, I've had 6 years of extra time. But if you
are a Gumiho, you'll have to wag your 9 tails to catch me, and would I be worth
it? 20 years more if a Gumiho did her magic, though that's just more Music in
the Night, I really must push the piano out of my bed.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: only a member of this blog may post a comment.